Ask Cory: New hookup operating procedures during the COVID19 outbreak
Dear Cory: I have been out-of-my-mind horny this week for some reason. Probably the impending apocalypse. Care to comment on these waves of lust and their timing?
Love is liberally admixed with everything else in a person’s mind. Imagine a blender set on very low.
Despite all the fun and feeling connection deep in my soul and all that, something happened in the park last week that freaked me out a bit and I feel like I need to ask someone about it.
Dear Cory:
We recently moved into a house with a lawn, and, though I’d rather dig the shit up and plant something useful, like potatoes, circumstances demand that we maintain the lawn as is. Thus, we need to buy a lawn mower.
The wife, and my inner environmentalist, want me to buy the relatively environmentally neutral (as if there’s anything environmentally neutral about a semi-suburban lawn) electric mower. However, I grew up with engines, the smell of gasoline and two-cycle oil, and the roar of combustion. Electric mowers just seem a little pansy. I mean no offense by that, I did a lot of guys before I got married, but I think you know what I’m getting at.
What should I do?
Dear Cory
I am resistant to referring to a married gay man as a husband. What do you make of the growing legality of gay marriage?
Gay and Greying
Dear Cory:
Is nothing sacred?
— Scared of the Void
Dear Cory: Why is it that men so often spit while urinating? I see this (okay, saw this long ago) among schoolboys in the park, and it’s just as common with men at the urinals at the opera. Is there an evolutionary explanation? — Horkin’ in the Boys’ Room
Dear Cory: So I’ve been trying to have a key copy made for my office at one of my jobs (I have to share it). There’s only one key so if it gets lost – problems. Plus I want to have it on my key chain rather than have to continually go to fetch it…
Hey Cory: Have a look at this ad. I’m sure you will be able to deconstruct it. My eyes hurt when I saw it. Thanks, my man, get to work! Mirror Balls